Fictional Prose Seeking Honest Critique
POEMS AND SHORT STORIES
Short stories and chapters from books and novels
Honest critique has been requested for these poems. Want to learn the art of critique? Join our Honestly Crafted Critique group.
Did I hear that right…?
My bad, I heard him
talking over ma’s bum,
about how the snakes
pied passage thru Ireland;
admittedly, I was panicked,
and then it dawned on me
they were religious, and
knew nothing of Parliament
or teal striped PJ's;
I'll wear a Kevlar dress,
and speak only of lavender;
I could probably pull it off…
talking over ma’s bum,
about how the snakes
pied passage thru Ireland;
admittedly, I was panicked,
and then it dawned on me
they were religious, and
knew nothing of Parliament
or teal striped PJ's;
I'll wear a Kevlar dress,
and speak only of lavender;
I could probably pull it off…
60 reads
4 Comments
For Joyous Sing
Ting goes the meatus
with joyous sing-a-ling
rubbing durp in er ears,
bursting tympanic membrane
with delicate debauchery;
whores? I like whores,
I like how they open their faces.
with joyous sing-a-ling
rubbing durp in er ears,
bursting tympanic membrane
with delicate debauchery;
whores? I like whores,
I like how they open their faces.
68 reads
8 Comments
I used to think I knew
Come walk with me
beyond this place
that takes an onion's cue,
in a laughing sense
with sadness mixed with
a galaxy's point of view,
I used to think I knew when
the poet came to life, perhaps
back in the days of enlightenment
where Humphry Davy dropped
his basket at the penny university,
or where the last great alchemist
was never revered as a scientist, ...
beyond this place
that takes an onion's cue,
in a laughing sense
with sadness mixed with
a galaxy's point of view,
I used to think I knew when
the poet came to life, perhaps
back in the days of enlightenment
where Humphry Davy dropped
his basket at the penny university,
or where the last great alchemist
was never revered as a scientist, ...
87 reads
8 Comments
How could one explain…?
How far is the moon;
Its just outside the door,
how long is the night;
the same as the one before,
why is the earth a magnet,
and no one knows quite why,
how can the eagle soar,
and yet never learn to fly,
how do the lines sum up
the face of Earth’s rotation,
displaying isogonic band,
yet have a variant declination,
how does the concave mirror ...
Its just outside the door,
how long is the night;
the same as the one before,
why is the earth a magnet,
and no one knows quite why,
how can the eagle soar,
and yet never learn to fly,
how do the lines sum up
the face of Earth’s rotation,
displaying isogonic band,
yet have a variant declination,
how does the concave mirror ...
78 reads
4 Comments
Souplimation
I dreamed of you, the words
were lost as she began to speak
pictures touching vapors
where a hound dog sleeps
soft and sweet, she’s tired;
I touched his shoe in a fever
as he handed me a bowl of cabbage,
were lost as she began to speak
pictures touching vapors
where a hound dog sleeps
soft and sweet, she’s tired;
I touched his shoe in a fever
as he handed me a bowl of cabbage,
58 reads
7 Comments
FINISHED
She was gone. That's it.
The only part of me that I could call life had shriveled
away to reveal an illusion that was never anything I had
dreamt it to be.
It was finished and I was finished.
I held the shot glass up to my lips. The bourbon sparkled
in the dim bar lights like sweet diamonds of forget.
The pleasant burning flow of peace tickled my throat as
my departed angel drifted further from my mind.
I'll think about her later, I thought, when all of this
is over with.
Later, always later.
I'm busy now trying to block out the pain. I'll get...
The only part of me that I could call life had shriveled
away to reveal an illusion that was never anything I had
dreamt it to be.
It was finished and I was finished.
I held the shot glass up to my lips. The bourbon sparkled
in the dim bar lights like sweet diamonds of forget.
The pleasant burning flow of peace tickled my throat as
my departed angel drifted further from my mind.
I'll think about her later, I thought, when all of this
is over with.
Later, always later.
I'm busy now trying to block out the pain. I'll get...
49 reads
2 Comments
Her name translates to hope
![restricted poem](/images/extremecontent.jpg)
61 reads
0 Comments
Narcissus Moon
Did you look up last night
to the brightened sky dove;
breathing, and did you walk
in the shadows of a lunatic’s love,
above with the light of being,
Graybeard that hung the lantern,
walking in clouds of white pillows,
the disguise of a place that drapes in space
as the crescent hand that willows the face,
following drifts of the misting,
in the light of the Narcissus Moon.
Did you feel it with your eyes, ...
to the brightened sky dove;
breathing, and did you walk
in the shadows of a lunatic’s love,
above with the light of being,
Graybeard that hung the lantern,
walking in clouds of white pillows,
the disguise of a place that drapes in space
as the crescent hand that willows the face,
following drifts of the misting,
in the light of the Narcissus Moon.
Did you feel it with your eyes, ...
73 reads
13 Comments
The Emptiness Of Peace
![restricted poem](/images/extremecontent.jpg)
92 reads
6 Comments
Standard Constellation Co., Ink
Take your demon and hide it there,
far over Orion's Belt; deep, glowing,
and unafraid, he laid the dripping box
in the giant painting of living
heartstrings with Persian eyes
in vivid hushed white; God toned
with a hue of old wine, the hunted
diamonds will never die, and then realize.
far over Orion's Belt; deep, glowing,
and unafraid, he laid the dripping box
in the giant painting of living
heartstrings with Persian eyes
in vivid hushed white; God toned
with a hue of old wine, the hunted
diamonds will never die, and then realize.
58 reads
6 Comments
Ma's Place in Nature
I fall to my knees in a purple guise,
time lay open, striking stillness
of a red jungle chicken corrupting the
English in seconds; life that sprang from
a woman’s breast that compensates with memories
of caramels, divinity, and fried breakfast toast.
time lay open, striking stillness
of a red jungle chicken corrupting the
English in seconds; life that sprang from
a woman’s breast that compensates with memories
of caramels, divinity, and fried breakfast toast.
61 reads
11 Comments
Darkness embraces me
The Darkness flows
It flows
within me
Waiting for a chance
To get out
Of my head
It feeds on me from the inside as i live through the days en nights
The weeks flow by as golden rivers of spermicides
The ice castle forms itself
Slowly
Gaining power from the souls it darkens
It grows
First there was chaos
And fire
And chaos
The universal state of the universe was revolving around the fact
That it was revolving around itself
It grows
The trees thicken as i approach them
The leafs turn...
It flows
within me
Waiting for a chance
To get out
Of my head
It feeds on me from the inside as i live through the days en nights
The weeks flow by as golden rivers of spermicides
The ice castle forms itself
Slowly
Gaining power from the souls it darkens
It grows
First there was chaos
And fire
And chaos
The universal state of the universe was revolving around the fact
That it was revolving around itself
It grows
The trees thicken as i approach them
The leafs turn...
40 reads
0 Comments
DU Poetry : Fictional Prose Seeking Critique: Short Stories and Chapters from Books and Novels (Page 3)