deepundergroundpoetry.com
You Wear Death Well
How many times have I told you, over and over again,
That your coat does not match your eyes?
How many times have I told you, throw it in the bin,
[and] That you would look better after you die?
Your abusive words, don't match your shoes.
You're such a jerk.
Your hair says you're not ready to lose,
[but] You're so insecure.
I've had enough of your mismatched clothes and acts,
I can't take it anymore.
I've prepared myself now to drop the axe,
I have allowed death to come knocking on your door.
I told you death would match your eyes,
But you did not believe me.
I can't tell your eyes where to look,
But maybe now that you're dead you will see
That I was right that your coat doesn't match your eyes,
That it was putting me through hell,
That your mouth puts out equally hideous lies,
But most of all that you wear death quite well.
That your coat does not match your eyes?
How many times have I told you, throw it in the bin,
[and] That you would look better after you die?
Your abusive words, don't match your shoes.
You're such a jerk.
Your hair says you're not ready to lose,
[but] You're so insecure.
I've had enough of your mismatched clothes and acts,
I can't take it anymore.
I've prepared myself now to drop the axe,
I have allowed death to come knocking on your door.
I told you death would match your eyes,
But you did not believe me.
I can't tell your eyes where to look,
But maybe now that you're dead you will see
That I was right that your coat doesn't match your eyes,
That it was putting me through hell,
That your mouth puts out equally hideous lies,
But most of all that you wear death quite well.
Written by
Angel_Of_Darkness
(Guardian Demon)
Published 23rd Feb 2013
| Edited 1st Apr 2013
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 3
reading list entries 0
comments 16
reads 147
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
Re: You Wear Death Well
23rd Feb 2013 10:53pm
Please comment freely, i would even like CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. I'm not ready for any harsh words yet...
Re: You Wear Death Well
23rd Feb 2013 11:31pm
What gives this piece life is it is crafted as if this would be part of a conversation. That highlight the intimacy of the words.
One could even read into the type of death. (metaphor for so many endings)
In a less upbeat way I am reminded of Rod Stewart's "You Wear It Well".
One could even read into the type of death. (metaphor for so many endings)
In a less upbeat way I am reminded of Rod Stewart's "You Wear It Well".
1
![Thumbs Up thumb](/images/poetry/thumb.gif)
re: Re: You Wear Death Well
23rd Feb 2013 11:43pm
Does it actually sound like that? I'm not upset about it, but I meant for it to come off as though he had already killed the other person and was talking to the dead body.
I'm not concerned about it--how the reader interprets it should very much be his/her decision, and I'm actually glad to hear that this poem allows for that.
I'm not concerned about it--how the reader interprets it should very much be his/her decision, and I'm actually glad to hear that this poem allows for that.
re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
24th Feb 2013 00:01am
I guess I just missed the clues that the death had already taken place. The big clue of course is the last line. (I should have been able to pick up on that one, since I do watch NCIS)
0
![Thumbs Up thumb](/images/poetry/thumb.gif)
Re: You Wear Death Well
24th Feb 2013 00:08am
You too? I love that show! Well, I prefer NCIS Los Angelos, but I used to watch both... until my parents condemned television programming rated TV-14. That was about six months ago, and I still am mad about it...
re: Re: You Wear Death Well
24th Feb 2013 00:44am
Well most of the time if my tv is on it is either Cspan or a sporting event. Those shows were the exceptions. (much more of a radio person)
0
![Thumbs Up thumb](/images/poetry/thumb.gif)
re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
24th Feb 2013 2:57am
Re: You Wear Death Well
24th Feb 2013 00:29am
Oh dear lord! I can't believe it! I made a typo!
In case anyone cares, in line 16 it should be you're instead of your.
I know it seems I'm overreacting, but I have OCD and I also have a knack for grammer. I shall shun myself for all eternity.
In case anyone cares, in line 16 it should be you're instead of your.
I know it seems I'm overreacting, but I have OCD and I also have a knack for grammer. I shall shun myself for all eternity.
re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 4:09am
Haha, that sucks. I hate when that happens, so you know what i do? I edit it. X) When you see the poem it's on the upper left side of the page. Hope you get it fixed. ;)
1
![Thumbs Up thumb](/images/poetry/thumb.gif)
re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 4:29am
re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 4:30am
re: re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 5:10am
re: re: re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 5:15am
re: re: re: re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 5:19am
Maybe your poetry stood out too much, that your eyes could divert attention from it? X)
0
![Thumbs Up thumb](/images/poetry/thumb.gif)
re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 5:28am
That's a rather happy way of thinking about it... heh. You really know how to make me feel good about myself, don't you? Thanks.
re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Re: You Wear Death Well
1st Apr 2013 5:34am