A Life

I just wanted
to be in love
for once
and it turn out,
you know?

Give my heart
to someone
who really wanted me
and wanted to be
with me.

Someone
who didn't mind
and didn't mind
that I didn't mind.

I really wanted
to kiss
and hug
and fuck
like crazy
and be madly
in love
and holding on
to someone
like it was the end
of the world
and we were laughing
as the asteroid hit
because just
finding each other
we had checked off
everything
on our bucket lists.

Was it too much
to ask
to just be
at peace
and have some fun
and cry
and have a child or two
and have worries
and pay attention
and not know enough
and make some mistakes
and want to start it
all over again
and do it the same way
just to say we could
and never change
a thing
even when
it ended
in a mess?

I just wanted to say
that I had tried
my hardest
and thought about it
and given my all
and had a shot
and done what I could.

And I wanted
to have had someone
say, "Thanks
for trying anyway
and that was great
and I'm so glad
that it was you
and I would not
have wanted
to have gone
through life
with anyone else
but you."

Was that
too much
to ask?  

I guess it was.

runningturtle87