If I Were A Friend

If I were a friend
I would be a 24-hour convenient
Store with all my benefits
Plastered on display so you could
Size up my conveniences.
Love for sale,
I would be the lucky extra
Cheeseburger you'd find in the
Bottom of your to-go bag, and
That strawberry milkshake they gave
You for waiting 30 minutes for your order.
Pretty nice
I would be an 50% coupon that
Saves you a bunch of stress in the
Long run, and that won't expire until
Next year--money back guarantee.
They say beauty is in the
Eyes of the beholder, so I guess
I'd always be your mirror loving\hating\caring
For you, just the way you are
And not for any window excuses.
If I were a friend I'd be your
Shoes when you run away from
All the abuse, fears, tension, what
Have you. Then, I'll be an old Teddy that
You can toss in the dumpster after
You're through punching and crying
All over me.
Yup,
I'd probably be a genie
Though you would've broken the lamp
Instead of rubbed it, and that 24-hour
Convenience store I'll change into
Wal-Mart. Of course, being your buddy,
I'm your five-finger-discount playground
With a gift certificate.
Plus being the merchant I am,
I won't ask for much, no, nothing
For you.
And for that, I won't be
A friend at all.