The Loser Life of a Meth Addict

This time I am done,
It is sad to say that I barely know my 6 month old son,
I once looked in the mirror and saw beauty staring back,
Now I look in the mirror while picking away after having just smoked a fat sack,
How pathetic am I? My life I need to get back on track,
You know, there has not been a day lately that I have not been high,
Family, friends and co-workers I am forced to lie,
They do not understand as to why,
I do this to myself, why take the time to explain? Why even try?
This journey I have taken so many times before,
Ending up at all hours of the night at my dealers door,
Stealing from strangers, family and friends just so that a fat sack I can score,
Or even considering laying on my back and spreading my legs becoming a whore,
You know, now that I think about it, doing meth has become quite the chore,
Endless hours of stealing, hustling, and than taking to pawn,
I will be the first one standing at their door when they open at dawn,
God! what the fuck was I thinking 6 months ago when again I took my first hit?
That here across from you I would again sit,
Holding my head in my hands as I sadly admit,
That I am hooked on this fucking shit,
Hoping, wishing, wanting for this to be it!
Tired of being in this dark, dreary pit,
Hopefully this time I will get it right,
I have no more will or energy to continue to fight,
Each day will get easier, so that I can see some light,
If it kills me I will try hard with all of my might!