My Fantasy

The first time I ever,
this makes me blush,
even as I hold your hand.

When we both went to the corner,
of the large cafeteria, and stood side
to side. We didn't know.

But we did.
I looked over my shoulder to see your eyes,
skimming the floor, leading up to my shoes.
Then turned around.

I came alone.
You brought your friends.
The small wooden table had layers and layers
of roses.
Yellows,
Reds,
but mostly pinks.
Which meant "crush."

A crudely drawn white sign leaned against a vase of yellow roses.
Yellow meant "friend."

I bought one yellow, for my friend.
A couple of more.
No pinks, I thought.
But only because you weren't getting any.

I never thought you would.
But as I turned back, to get a pink rose,
just because.

I saw you quickly shove a wrinkled note into the 6th grader's hand.
And receive a pink rose, that you quickly hid from your friends.

My heart beating rapidly like a drum, I went red.
Thinking about that dream I had.
Where you-- but it's stupid.
Never going to happen.

I turned to face my friend, who I heard.
But then I saw you, blocking my direction.
You were gripping the rose so hard,
the thorns didn't seem to puncture you at all.

You nervously smiled,
with the one that made me melt.
Then you asked who it was for.

"What?" I asked nervously, completely
aware what you were asking about.
You moved your gorgeous eyes towards
the pink rose I held in my hand.
I was so close to telling you,
but I shrugged and mumbled,
"I dunno."

I asked you the same.
I expected the same answer,
Who would give a pink rose to me?
The newest girl in the grade.

I felt your hot hand against my wrist.
And found myself outside, in the courtyard.
You held one hand,
and in the other hand,
placed that pink rose that
I had been eyeing.

I did the same with mine.
I smiled.
A faint smile.
It was one of those, "I love you more than anything"
smiles.
It wasn't big.
But it was the first smile.
That meant something to me.

No explanation.
No need for words.
You laughed, and so did I.
But I only laughed because your laugh
made me so happy.

Hands still intertwined,
finger to finger.
Pushing through the doors.
Walking through the halls.
Hand in hand.

A few glances.
A few stares.
I could care less.
All I saw was you.
The new...
the new part of me, but
in a new way.

Just like my dream last night.
I wish it would come true already.