what she wants but dose not want

she sits in the shower
she thinks why kid myself
she knows the pain feels good
she wants to take the razor
she watchs the blood run down her arm
she licks the blood
she likes the taste
she cuts her self but not ofter
she dosent want to be put away but in away she wants to go away
she wants to go in the hospital with people like her
she hates the outsides
she knows shell miss it when it gone