All the Way to Wyoming

She said
she had long hair
the kind that ran away
all by itself
soft and fine
clear down to her waist

She told me she wrote poetry
on the internet
talked like a free spirit
said she had no ties

I thought maybe
we could write
hoochie-coochie jingles together
climb mountains
by candlelight
on the fly

Now hoochie-coochie's
never been my style
but when I got her photo
with those big green eyes
it kind of clinched the deal
and made my heart beat
faster than you can whisper
America online

So I jumped on a plane
took a trip on a bus
hitched a ride in a truck
thought I'd be her
big surprise
but when I knocked on her door
something didn't feel right--

and holy fuck
the she was a guy