Mentally Insane

The past is repeating its self all over again but with out the bleach baths and the burning of my skin .

The ropes you use to tie me up the screaming of my voice the hits and kicks I get when I refuse to let you in .

The screaming of my voice saying no are being blocked by the rope you tied over my mouth .

The crying that I do turns you on even more and every night you say oh how I love you when you finished with your torture and abuse.

I looks at myself in the mirror and cry  and cut my wrist deep as I see the bruses and the kiss marks that are left on my skin .

I am slowly going mentally insane I know this wont stop evey night you want more and every night I cry wishing I could die .

I sleep for hours not wanting to live in reality and when I wake up you are there smiling asking if I enjoyed myself.

You know the answer I hate it there are times I even tryed to run away.

But you always told the cops that everything I say is a lie you would scream out she is mentally insane she just needs to stay at home that is all now good bye.

They never question you again about anything not the bruses or the marks not a single why does she look like this .

I am starting to loose everything that is me the pain of the ropes the punches from your fists the pain of you forcing your self inside me makes gag and throw up all over the floor.

But no one sees what going on because I always hide it deep inside because no one can see past this mask that I put on and noone would care what is even going on.

I know what I am and that is a doll a sex toy for your sick games.

My past keeps repeating its self and that is never going to change there is only one way out.

That is to go mentally insane and not care what happens and eventually kill myself  that is the only way become free from this nightmare............