Unsaid Words

Unsaid Words
As I look at you standing on the scales I am full of wonderment.
You are so beautiful I’m choked with emotion.
I see you standing with your chicken legs peering down and I feel so proud of you.
Your energy and drive inspire me.
I find you to be absolutely incredible and yet I simply watch you and do not say a word.
You may feel I take you for granted but I beg you please do not do that.
I have been hurt so much that I learned to lock in my thoughts and stay silent even when I know I should speak.
I trained myself to let the moment go hoping for a better line next time.
Spontaneity means daring to make mistakes and allow the protective shell to be pierced.
When you are the eldest you have to learn all by yourself.
When you are made to feel as if you do not fit in you retreat into yourself.
You can either play the game of life or sit on the sidelines watching but being safe.
I need to lead and live my life because that is who I am.
My head is full of ideas but currently has no direction; it is as if I am drowning.
I know I have to sink to the bottom in order to spring back and I also know that I can and will spring back stronger than ever.
The one major regret in my life and that is that we did not have a child.
I can see you on the scales smiling and proudly rubbing your enlarged belly.
You look simply stunning; I need say no more on that subject.
You see a lot happens when I watch you on the scales I have private thoughts and unsaid words.