Blood Stained

For a while it eases my agonizing pain  
But the memories sadly still remain.  
It haunts me every night and day  
I doubt it will ever go away.  
I'm alone now with my brand new knife  
Thinking about taking my pitiful life.  
Then more and more I start to lean back  
Until I fall into the swirling clouds as my world goes black.  
Minutes, then hours go by before I awake  
I look at my arm and see my huge mistake.  
Now I try and cover it up with my shirt  
To cover the stripes, the blood, and all the hurt.  
My white shirt is now soaked red and stained  
Feels like half of my body and soul has been drained.  
The battle wages on and on, it never ends  
Through my burning pain I'll lose my angel and friends.  
They won't hear my cries for help, my ever fading screams  
As more of my blood slowly drips and streams.  
And now my pain and fears push her away from me  
I fear that one day she'll be gone and alone is all I'll be.  
Broken and torn I'll be left in the rain  
Trembling on my knees cause I just can't take the pain.  
Now my worst fear has finally come true  
This day had been approaching for awhile, somehow i always knew.  
She's gone now...she's left me to face my battles on my own  
I thought she’d be mine forever, and that I’d never again be alone.  
But here I am by myself, 3 days before I leave to go to Spain  
As if I really needed this shit now, as if I’m not already about to go insane.  
I thought she was different, and now I pay for that mistake with a broken heart  
Because of her I paint new scars, and add a new collection to my blood stained art.  
I’m not sure if she thought it all through, or thought about how much was at stake  
But now it’s too late, because I am now floating out at sea, never again to awake.