Like She Killed Me (Rap)

Like She Killed Me

**Stop saying you love, you don't love me. Bullshit, stop fucking saying it**

They say a picture's worth a thousand words
Actions just a stream of pictures, lets pull it down to earth
I don't feel an ounce of worth, to reveal the scars
Gotta skip the chorus cause I need about a billion bars
It's really hard to admit I was even part of this shit
Pardoned you with my heart till it split kept bartering with
Every ounce of my soul but any answer was cold
After each divide inside me then the cancer would grow
Til I was about to explode thinking fractures would show
But you could change for me right? No way the patterns would hold
You loved me, you told me, you promised it was true
But the changes never came, I feel awful and it's you

Let's start with a history lesson got my misery stretchin
Years back, fear that you're clearly switching intentions
Told me you cheated in a heated kissing confession
I let it slide, killed me, but I wasn't really aggressive
Feel I been blessed with a huge capacity to love
People learn from mistakes, they don't have to be dumb
But you're actually numb cause you didn't change a bit
And what's stranger is I didn't see it as dangerous

Sad to lose, we had to move, did it long distance
Never acted as my girl, maybe a strong mistress
Gone a year, back a month I never saw this bitch
She would text me like we've got a real problem it's
You're needy wanna see me on some stupid constant ish
Baby, once or twice a week am I wrong in this?
I want to be with you princess, that's my honest wish
Supposedly in love, can't feel it so lost and pissed

We were fighting a lot, we planned a day together
Needed a break for pleasure so we could make it better
Promised, as you may remember a fake endeavor
Asked after one task is this gonna take forever?
Left me for other plans, drowning in a lake of embers
Recall clenching my fists into two shaking tremors
Can't believe it, but before you break you bend first
Pain pervades proper perceptions when you've been hurt
On and off, off an on, on and on, kept dropping bombs
Love and hate, found friendship and finally caught a calm
Embarrassed as my lover, naively believed the problems gone
It's absurd that this could work, and nope, I still got it wrong
You fucking asked me to come over and to spend the night
Kissed me gently at the door, it must have meant it's right
Thought we could pretend a bit even though we ended it
Had a chance to mend the splits, admitted not intelligent
Staring at you, caught a glimpse of a lover's eyes
Looking great bathed in the beauty of a hundred lies
We were so broken, holding you had to wonder why
Left me at your house at 2 AM to see another guy

**Hey, what are you doing? I thought you just went to go drop something off real quick? You've already been gone like 20 minutes. Yeah, I'm mad at you. We'll talk about it when you get back, I'm going on a walk. I don't care if I don't know the city, just don't lock me out**

Already walked for two hours out in the dark & cold
Texted I'd be back whenever, had to charge my phone
Called me up like you shouldn't go that far alone
Picked me up like 20 blocks out, set her car for home
We got back, she passed out and tried to snuggle up
I'm staring at her as she falls asleep like what the fuck
Can't react yet, I'm quiet still stuck in thunderstruck
Couldn't sleep a wink, brain in circles, let it run amok
It all clicked, perspective switch. where to place the fault
Biting through my tongue, both lips got the taste of salt
Plainly saw you kept breaking me until it made me fall
Seriously struck me how stupid I was, I hate it all

Reluctant to even say it cause I feel so weak
Got played over and over like you hit repeat
So instantly got a deep desire to kick your teeth
Straight through the back of your head for being a bitch to me
If I sit and think what you did to me gets to me
Whipped defeat, definitely shoulda done it differently
But you kept kissing me, told me how much you're missing me
Then did this shit to me i cant solve the mystery
Dissolve in misery, how could you do this?
Are you really that cold hearted or just clueless?
You an asshole in the past shows that nothing's certain
But I'd like to believe you could be a loving person

Got me questioning my worth
Don't have enough words to explain how I hurt
That's just the tip of the iceberg
But you get the picture, I'm out of nice words
Guess that's just how life works
I been up so long both of my eyes hurt
Kicked her out of my life in hopes that might work
But it's like she killed me, with no survivor