deepundergroundpoetry.com
A Moment Of Weakness.
A moment of weakness,
A slow release,
Of all my sorrow,
A lukewarm bath,
No thoughts of tomorrow
A gentle blade,
Licks my arm,
A trickle of blood,
Does all the harm,
A flow of tears,
Followed by a piercing laugh,
A sense of freedom,
Yet a gain of pain,
A realisation comes,
Now im losing control,
A cry for help,
Waiting for an answer,
A loss of conciousness,
It's too late now,
A saviour isn't coming,
My last look at life
A thought of why
In my last
Moment of weakness....
Published 21st Mar 2011
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likes 5
reading list entries 1
comments 8
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
21st Mar 2011 7:55pm
I love this, LOVE how graceful and beautiful you have made the blade and how the beginning and end contrast in rhyme. Its just amazing, really great work :)
21st Mar 2011 9:00pm
21st Mar 2011 10:12pm
21st Mar 2011 10:17pm
Thanks (: I am glad you read it and appreciate the feelings that it took to write it (:
22nd Mar 2011 5:23pm
i really liked your poem it was touching the words the feeling of helplessness when you cry out for help the feeling of regret i got when it was to late for u to be saved beautifully written
22nd Mar 2011 8:34pm
22nd Mar 2011 9:00pm
you keep repeating some words which is no use!
try exploring and experimenting with the words and your feelings
try exploring and experimenting with the words and your feelings
22nd Mar 2011 10:40pm