Completely Self Centered

i could not tell you exactly where i am going anymore
the magnetism stems
from trembling steps
stumbled forward
life times ago

the urgency is unbearable
but the only way to get there
is one step at a time

i finally have a map made of mysterious symbols
yet i trust it more
than every moment and memory
combined

i am radiating orange
and i know
this means nothing good
for old notions
of dependence
romantics
and masturbation

what would you be willing
to give up
to help heal the world
if you knew the potential was massive
if you felt it was almost too late
if you had no concrete way
of proving either

how would you feel
faced with leaving behind
all you ever knew
as truth

would you be willing to be perceived as crazy
to pursue genuine sanity?

i am scared shitless
but i want this more
than anything else

to stop pretending
i am only
human