You left me here alone.

Today I woke up with hope,
More than I felt in a while.
I felt better today,
but a part of me died today.

As I read your words,
I felt what little I had left...
shatter and scatter all around me.

I realized that no matter what
NO matter what I say
what I try
whether or not I cry...
Darkness will always fill my soul.
I am darkness.

Like the moon that tries to illuminate  darkness
I am constantly surrounded in it.
Even now the Stars are too far
Too far to reach
Too far to help.
They have gone away
The Sun, it chases the darkness

You left me
Not cutting ties,
Not leaving in the sense of saying goodbye,
But you have left me alone, to my thoughts.
What you didn't know
Has proved to be fatal to me.

I realize now that I am constantly on the ledge
I constantly fight the urge to jump
I fight the curiosity of falling
But what if in reality I was always
Falling.

What I feared most
What I attempted to avoid
What I never wanted to happen
Has occurred
And I feel as though
It was what I needed to accept
To accept that maybe
Just maybe I will never be free
Free of the darkness that consumes me

If I am the moon, then there is hope
For the moon continues to shine,
At all times
Even when the darkness hides a part of her
The Stars accompany her
A silent support
Far away
Yet present.
The Sun, it fights the darkness each day
Attempting to free the Moon

But the fact that you have gone
Makes me wonder if I am the Moon
If I am capable
Worthy of sharing this

All I do is bring pain
It happens every single time.
One way or another
I question if
If the fact that you have gone is a sign
A sign that maybe I should spare you
Spare you the pain of being with me...