WINTER NIGHTS  RAINY STREETS        (Thinking Of You; for T.B.)  (date unknown)

    winter rains
falling
    in the streets
have me
    recalling
many old blues  
    daydreaming
here tonight
    as i stare off
into the snaking
    colored ribboned
reflections
    of stop lights  
go lights
    and yellow caution  
like sunflowers
    poured into
molten streams
    shimmering me
into shivers
    of goose bump
chills  thinking of
    you lights
now as the
    stream runs red
it seems as
    if i am
still locked behind
    the wheel here
but with you too
    somehow locked
here inside
    my head
as well  where
    all i have
left of you  
    aside from a
handful of
    distant memories
is a single
    picture
you mailed me
    and that tigers
eye stone
    you gave me
so long ago
    when i last
visited you
    in san francisco
now i havent
    seen you in
years
    and i sense
you may even
    be long dead
and gone  
    though i am
not  
    still as yet
your story was
    written
all over you
    yet even now  
i recall  
    just how
at peace
    you were
with it all
    and your
fearless
    certainty of
leaving
    and the
mysterious
    words written
on back of
    your photograph
in your
    warm hand  
seemed
    to spill forth
the essence
    of your
courageous truth
    and your strong  
yet silently
    graceful  
masculine  
    inner beauty
into some form
    of accepting
pre epitaph
    for you
and me and
    others yet to
come
    to help us
see ourselves
    in your shoes
before we ever
    get that far
though i
    suspect  some
never will
    and those
already
    long down
that path
    may look back
and see you
    coming
and me perhaps  
    most likely too
and there  
    we will be
happy
    and free
from all this
    fear once more
in spite of
    all our
suffering
    down here
when at last
    well be
together there
    once again
my friend
    along with all
the others
    of our
families  friends
    and lovers
whom weve
    known and
loved and lost
    but in
the meantime  
    i still see
your face
    and recognize
me there
    as well
in the distant
    reflection
of your
    soulful eyes
reflecting
    in my mind
here in these
    fleeting
moments
    arisen through
the colored
    lights  of this
winter nights  
    rainy streets
as i stare
    timelessly
off into these
    snaking  colored  
ribbon like
    reflections
of stop lights  
    go lights
and yellow
    caution  like
sunflowers  poured
    into molten
streams
    shimmering
me into shivers
    of sudden  
goose bump chills
    thinking of you
lights here
    until this
stop lights
    much too
brief  hypnotic  
    red ribbon like
snakes
    suddenly turn
and change again  
    back into
another slithering
    molten stream
of green
    shimmering me
into an abrupt
    goose bumpless
startled refocus
    upon this
rainy  
    winter nights
wet street
    presently
before me
    here  
and the open  
    lengthy  
quietly awaiting  
    unknown  
future road
    and roads
to come  still
    yet  perhaps
ahead      

    (or not)