PRESSED IN A POUT

She gave a wink; she furnished a kiss, I was thinking of her; when I walked into this. I went out for a breath of fresh air; on a hot humid night, when I heard a voice beckon; "honey; would you have a light". She was under a street lamp; her lipstick a mess, her wig all askew; falling in golden tress. Her black hose was torn; her lips pressed in a pout, I strolled on over; like a real boy scout. As I drew closer; I saw the tears flow, she said "please help me big boy"; as I said "hello". Being a gentleman; I asked "what is the matter", she said "my last trick; left me in tatters". I said "please call me Charlie"; she responded with "Kate", we met on a street corner; where I met my fate. A copper approached; placed my hands behind back, I asked" what's the charge"; please cut me some slack". He answered "solicitation"; then read me my rights, that's when Kate hit him hard; and started a fight. Mayhem did follow; anger took flight, I was caught in the middle; pissing in fright. Somebody said "fuck him up"; confusion did rule, Kate's penis fell out; I felt such a fool. They led us to a paddy wagon; like common crooks, wrists in handcuffs; all the way to central book. I spent the night; in a cold county cell, sitting beside Kate; who was remorseful as Hell. The very next morning; the Judge discharged my case, he couldn't stop laughing; when I showed up with Kate. We are still friends; though now he's called Nate, when wife tells this story; she so understates.