Mind over Matter

If I could write my feelings for him in a song
it’d be the longest song ever written
but this is not a song,
this is a poem,
and like life poems end,
and like poems relationships end, people end,
and I wonder why I never take the time to ask my self why
why I waste my love on a boy, my pain on a song, my thoughts on a poem,
but the thing is when your stuck in the hole of heartbreak time disappears
and all the time you could be spending on yourself
you spend dwelling deeper into the past
into the regret,
and into the person you think you know, but you don’t,
who are you kidding?
you only met him weeks ago
and your like this?
you got it bad kid,
I know
I always do,
but this is not a cold or a flu
this is love,
but why?
the question is why do you fall so fast?so hard?
why do you give in so easy?
This is not a poem about him at all is it?
No,because if it wasn’t for your insecurities, your actions, your words,
his wouldn’t matter to you at all,
but the ego comes first,
and his won,
and that is what hurts.