THIS SOLITUDE OF BEING

My mother’s arms did not know me
my father’s eyes did not own me
although those arms held me
and those eyes devoured me
I was still not home

Always feeling different
always keeping myself apart
although other hearts
beat against my heart
and other tongues
sought to salve my hurt…

…still I was alone

I smiled an enchanting smile
I spoke the acceptable words
I tried to be like other men
but was rejected from the tribe

I was a buggered angel
a divine demon
an earth bound spirit
longing to depart

I was always a stranger
always a danger
to my isolated heart

I’ve been
analysed hypnotized tranquilized
diagnosed and drugged
and yet all of this
could never save me
could never keep me
from this solitude of being

I was born a stranger
and a stranger I remain
to friends and others;
lovers and other strangers

(Drawing: Loneliness 1 by Carlton)
© Carlton Carr 2013
http://othervoices.blog.co.uk/