Back and Forth

I go back and forth
Between lazy days
And days I'm productive
Creating new things
And being destructive
Between sober days
Noble days
Lonely days
The only way to beak the cycle of the latter days
Are social days
Which sadly are opposite of sober days
So I'm back and forth
Between social and socially muddled
From "I wanna cuddle"
To "Stay the fuck out of my bubble"
Days I'd rather smoke and drink
Than think about my troubles
Days I'd rather stay in bed
beneath the sheets and huddled
And I go back and forth
Between crossed wires when synapses fire
And tacky pick-up lines I should probably retire
From introvertive hermit with pursed lips and ire
To pouring my curses louder than the town crier
Because I'm back and forth
The scales are never balanced
Teeter to and fro between patience and malice
Either gracious or callous
I go back and forth