"Why are you being ... Such A Sphincter ?" ... A Poem written by Big Virge 24/8/2006

I was with a ....  female friend
when our conversation ... led ...

to ......
" Condescending Sinners " ... !!!
who are ... CLEARLY ...
.... " Walking Sphincters " .... !!!!!

Those who ... THINK ... ?
Their SHIT ... DON"T STINK ... ?!?!?

and think their views ...
are ... "Ever so" ... COOL ... !!!

which of course ... Allows Them ...
to ... Talk Down ... to you ... ?!? ...

Now ....
If you don't know ... ?
what a ... " Sphincter " ... is ... ?

It's a muscle that's ... shaped ...
Kind of like .... " A Ring " ....

Like the one that ... OPENS ...
when you've ... got to ... GO ... !!!!!

or in other words ...
what we call ... " AN ASSHOLE " ... !!!!!

Now ...
You know ... " The Type " ... !!!
about whom ... I write ...

Those who ...
Talk to you ...
Whilst looking down ...

"Their Nose" ... !!!

"Ignorant Clowns" ...
who should .....
Keep their mouths ...

..... "Closed" ...... !!!!!!!

I've seen them come ...
I've seen them ... " GO " ...

Many of ... "THEM" ...
Claim to ... " Write Prose " ...
and ... some of them ... "attempt" ...
to host .... " Live Shows " ..... !!! .....

"Spoken Word"
or ... " Radio " ...  ?

Many of them ...
Really Should ... STAY HOME ... !!!!!

Instead of making ...
" Ridiculous " ... quotes ... !?!
That Clearly ... SHOWS ...
What's Up ... " Their Nose " ... !!!!!

TV's .... The Same .... !!!

because of ... " FAME " ... !!!!!

These people ... " THINK " ...
They're ... " Oh So Slick " ... !!!!!
when clearly ... they're ...

" The Weakest Link " ... !!!!!

Come on now folks ... !!!

Haven't you had enough ?!?
of ... " Sphincter Clowns " ... !!!
whose noses are ... BROWN ... !!!

They're Clearly ... SICK ... !!!
because they ... " Lick " ...
THAT ... " Anal Hole " ... !!!!!!!

Where ...
SHIT ... comes out ... !!!!!

Now ....
Captain Kirk and his crew ...
May Be ..... " Quite Bold " ..... !!!

But ...
That's a ... " Black hole " ...
They Won't ... Boldly Go ... !!!!!

YES .....
That's a ... JOKE ... !!!
but ... Trust Me ... folks ...

" Human " ... sphincters ...
have sold ... Their Souls ... !!!

Let those words ... SOAK ...
Beyond ... The Sphincter ...
You call ... Your Throat ...

Who ... do you know ?
who ... Acts like ... this ... ?

Men that ... "snitch" ... ?
or ... Women who ... "Bitch" ... ?

We all know ... ONE ... !!!
who lives by ... "Tricks" ...
and think that ... THEY ...
are ... " Oh So GREAT !!! " ...

or .... " Intellectuals " ....
who think they're ... COOL ...
because they've been ...
" To " ..... Festivals .....

Where ... Hip Hop played ...
and they heard ... Reggae ...

"I say, I say !!!
Have you heard, that tune ?!?
by those two, coloured youths ?
They were so good
that i'm, down with the hood !!!"

Now ....
Replies like ... THIS ...
tend to leave them ...
... " Flustered " ...

"You said that, they were,
coloured, could you be,
more exact, were they
Green, Pink or Yellow ?
or, are you saying ?
They were black ?"

"So now, you're down !
with the hood !!!
Don't you live in ?
St. John's wood !?!
In actual fact,
don't you have,
another flat ?
Somewhere in, Upper Sheen
A place where, coloured people
are rarely ever, seen, unless
they're there, to clean !!!?!!!"

These people live in ...
....... " Dreams " .......
in ... " Comfort Zones "
with ..... MEANS ......

A stash of cash ...
that could buy ...
Ki's of ... "GREEN" ... !!!!!
YES ... Ki's ... of weed ... !!!
Enough to ... FEED ...

Drug families ... !!!
Right here and ... Overseas ... !!?!!

Trust me ... " BELIEVE "
Rich People ... aren't ...
all ... " Squeaky Clean " ... !!!!!

That's why ...
" STRAIGHT SPEAK "
Makes them ...
" Feel WEAK " ... !!!!!

When my friend and I
sat and ... "Analysed"

I said to her ....

"These human sphincters
make me sick !!!
I'll write a script
that, lyrically flips,
and sheds some light,
on these, Bourgeois Types,
who think they're right
whether day or night,
because they're living,
life alright !!!!!"

"They" ... aren't afraid ...
of more ... price HIKES ...
because their father,
sets the price !!!

To Ensure ... that he ...
gets a .... " BIG SLICE " .... !!!!!

to pay for his home ...
In The ... " Countryside " ...

"His" ... Second Home ... !!!
Oh Yes .... That's Right .... !!!!!
and the ... " Four by Four " ...
for his ... " Greedy Wife " ...
who cannot drive ... but ...
Wants the car because ...
It's Price is ... " HIGH " ... !!?!!

These people live ...
A ... DIFFERENT ... life ...

Then ... talk to us like
We ... DON"T HAVE ... a mind !!!

But .....
What about ... "Those" ... ?
who are ... EVEN WORSE ... !!!!!

" Bourgeoise " ... WANNABEES ... ??!??
who ... Try to be ... like ...

.... " The Bourgeoisie " ....

when they live at .... Number 9
down the ... " Very Next Street " ... !?!

Living in .... DEBT
Like ... everyone else ... ?!?

ALL SHOW ... !!!
and ... NO TELL ... ???

with their nose ... "In The Air"
cos' they ... Don't Like ...  

....... " The Smell " ........

of ... their own ...
" Fake Lives " ...
and their ... " Fake Insights " ...

The Only Time ...
They're ... NOT FAKE ...
is when ... THEY LIE ... !!!!!

Take a minute and ... THINK ...

Then ...
Rewind that line
Inside ..... Your Mind ..... !!!

The lives ... they lead ...
are so ... " CONTRIVED " ...

That's why ...
They Don't Like ...
The words I write ...

"Condescending" ... Termites ...
Well .... " REALITY BITES " ....
and as time .... " Flies " ....

They may just find ... ???
That thoughts they ... "TRUST"
May leave them ... " STUCK " ... !!!!!

and ... Those of them ...
who live life ... " Blinkered "

WILL .... Fall Foul of ....
Those of us ... Who Are ...

..... " THINKERS " ..... !!!!!!!!!

Who ...
Look at them thinking ...

"Why are you being
Such a SPHINCTER !?! "