Bob, the Nutless Wonder

Now Bob's my dog and was born with nuts
but what with the surplus of dogs and such
I thought it'd be a good idea to have both of his nuts removed

they say it makes em a better pet
so I took him down to the local vet
but little did i know that trouble was about to ensue

well they brought me bob, minus his balls
but it didn't seem to phase 'em at all
in fact he looked at me like he'd somehow been reborn

hell we hadn't even made it as far as the door
when he spotted a lassie and looking to score
he jumped on her like he was a leading man in a porn!

I tried to get him to stop but it was nothing doin
they finally finished then lay in the corner spoonin
I picked up bob and quickly headed out that door

I threw him in the truck and drove away
I could tell something in'm changed that day
He'd just got laid but looked like he was wantin more

the neighborhood kids nicknamed him 'horny'
cause i swear he left the house every morning
and didn't come back till he'd been with every bitch in town

well it didn't take long for word to get out
then every news reporter and even a talent scout
came around to see my nutless horny hound

They said if he did have balls they'd be made of granite
he got his own show on animal planet
and endorsement deals with alpo and kibbles and bits!

yeah my nutless wonder is now makin bank
and I guess ive got ol' bob to thank
cause as his manager,yeah... I get 10 percent!