a thought in four parts

I look for you in the morning light.
I look for you when I wake up
I used to know what I was looking for.
I used to know that I loved you
once there were people
looking at me like I look at you
once a girl smiled at me
and I smiled back
I think of you as an angel
I think the world is laughing at us.  
People try to tell us things.
They try to tell us that there
is no life that the world hasn’t seen yet
there is no love that I haven’t felt.
The works of the poets fuel the fires of the cold and hungry.
There is no hope for the hopeful.
There is no hope for the hopeless.


Let me tell you about the day
that I first saw her
she was so beautiful that no one
could believe what they were seeing.  
No one believed that there was a way to be this happy.
I don’t believe that there is anything
to say to you that you haven’t already heard.  
Your beauty blinds people to your true brilliance.  
Your kindness hides your true strength.  
I look at lovers like the spring.
Newness tells us that there has
never been anything so good as this.  
I look at you as I look to love
never let me forget that there
is a price to pay for freedom
that the heart wants what the heart wants
I don’t know what I’m saying
I know that you don’t care.  
Tell me that you love me and me alone.  
I love only you.  
I only love you.
I love you only.  
Only I love you.  
The meaning changes as the phrase evolves.  
What is the world to those who don’t like the sun.  
the moon is for lovers and everything
else is owned by selfish assholes.  


If you are reading this, stop.  
Tear out the page, crumple it up.
Throw it away.
Light the trash can on fire.  
You’re wasting your time with this.  

There is nothing at all like our hopelessness
there is nothing that the world doesn’t see
there is nothing that I can’t help you with
the only thing I know for sure
is that the world doesn’t know who the fuck it is dealing with.
I can take you all on.
I’m not scared of any of you.
Try to stop me.