when suicide becomes honey to my ears

I tried so hard.... And did the best I can... I never became what you needed... I feel so sick... The deep black shadow comes in to me... And know im so numb... I would of died for you... I would gave up my stupid life just for you.... Rip out my hart and hope to die.... You where my life... You where the only thing that gave me a reason... Now I just live in vain... My thoughts and feelings are rotting... My soul is dead and my thoughts never leave me happy... I look up and hope some one was here.... But I forget I trapped my self here... And no one knows who I really am... And sadly im happy they don't... But the feeling left inside leaves me so cold... I hold my breathe and hope for deth... I cut my wrist the let the pain out... And cross my hart and hope to die.... No one hears my cry's... NO ONE SEES THE FUCKING PAIN!!! Why must I move on WHY!?... FUCK THIS ALL AND FUCK THIS GOD DAMNED WORLD... I already tried  to find my place... And found nothing.... I guess this world isn't ment for me... I feel so cold... Alone.... Sad... Im so sick of this.... My hart is broken... And my thoughts are shared... I can't think straight...I feel the need for some one.... I would die for ant one...im I alone?