Ashes to Ashes

The myriad of pages burning contain
my written sorrows and scribed pain,
they leave nothing in their dark wake
but bitter betrayal and lingering shame.

Memories torment me time and again
tears that fall without pause or refrain,  
leaving their indelible salt laden stain
of failed attempts to recapture a love feigned

You who were my hearts only chatelaine;
the purest love that I could have offered
you have, with no remorse, mercilessly slain,
now have become my life story’s  villain.

For  you my purpose has run its course,
seeking a new love to quicken you again,
a deep wound you carved in my soul
and on my chest a spreading bloodstain.

I, struck down by surprise as was Able
by your  vicious maliciousness, my Cain,
I was left in a pool of pain unimaginable
that threatened to keep me enchained.

Leveling harsh insults feeling a violent disdain,
I was not your type you said when asked to explain.
The agony and shock were truly inhumain
after years of imagined love the truth was plain.

You had decided without a moments restrain
to destroy my confidence with no remorse
alone now I am laid low, my future uncertain
like a million pieces of  porcelain, I am broken.

How do I, my needed confidence reattain?
I conclude that from love I must abstain,
the tears continue to fall like midnight rain,
who I see in the mirror is still just plain Jane.

I am tiered; my spirit is weary and drained
all I want now is to sleep the eternal sleep
leave behind the lifelong  cruelty of this domain
and there from the burden become unchained .

Maybe then, in solitude my inner peace I will regain
forgetting the love that became a pungent bane.
Let these bitter words formed into sad quatrains
burn into ashes so their power never again has reign.

Gypsy Red