deepundergroundpoetry.com
I Want You
when I met you
what I should have said was
I want you
no awkward openings
misunderstandings
no untruths
our eyes met when you set foot outside your door
nothing sinister about my intentions
just can’t let you pass with a rush of blood to the head
trembling hands
arcing before we touch
This poem was submitted in the Hindsight comp
Prompt: When I met you, what I should have said was...
Published 1st Jul 2013
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
- Edited 14th May 2018 5:43pm
1st Jul 2013 4:05pm
<< post removed >>
1st Jul 2013 4:49pm
Thanks AngelicD for your comments.
We had a limit of 50 something words, but I may write an extended version to explore this piece a little further.
We had a limit of 50 something words, but I may write an extended version to explore this piece a little further.
Anonymous
- Edited 14th Nov 2018 6:35pm
2nd Jul 2013 5:31pm
<< post removed >>
2nd Jul 2013 5:41pm
Thank you Magdalena for your comments. Unfortunately I was beaten by a better poet on the day.
Thanks for following. I'm stoked!
Thanks for following. I'm stoked!
5th Jul 2013 4:57pm
I would say definitely go for the extended version!!
This is a sick start
I love it
This is a sick start
I love it
5th Jul 2013 5:26pm