John

I can't handle living with out you seeing as you were the only light to my darkness. You were the only one who made me feel a true sense of happiness. I miss your tender giving kisses which were stolen at every chance. I miss how you held me, with your body pressed against mine. How I could feel your heart racing when we lay there silently. How the words "I love you" made me feel needed. How you gently kissed  my neck so sweetly which sent tingles down my spine. With one touch you could make me feel so safe and loved. You were the only person who when they said "it will be okay" I believed. You were my everything, my reason to live. When you told me you don't love me or care about me, I broke. Into a million pieces which can never be put back together. My darkness is now constantly haunting me. Slowly wrenching at my chest, Telling me I'm not good enough for anyone, I am unlovable. I can't handle this life without you to keep me sane. It hurts so fucking much. The worst of It is that you don't care, your promises meant nothing. You promised to never leave, no matter how hard it got. You promised that you would be there always. You promised you would always love me. You broke every one of those. Again I can't trust anyone. I hate this longing feeling to be with you. But I know it will never happen. You don't want me now and never have. You have already found someone better than me, I told you I'm easily replaced.