deepundergroundpoetry.com
Spectral Secrets
I yawn and remain wakeful. I don’t
know why I keep this vigil. There hasn't
been a single night that gave a hint
towards an answer.
I refuse sleep as a refuge and I am not
wrong there. It offers subconscious
entrapments in fast-fading dream-mares.
I awake, already dreading yet wanting to remember.
Then forgetting anyway.
Then interrupted slumber brings me the
disorderly vomit of mind processing - a
pregnant sister drinking vinegar, a friend
bickering over clothing, distorted dogs - and
I
think, this isn’t helping.
Better to stay up, tap tap tapping across
the keyboard, turning it into a Ouija board
that could be, maybe, truly
connected to inner spectral secrets.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 17
reading list entries 1
comments 30
reads 169
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
- Edited 11th May 2018 9:36pm
29th Apr 2013 10:27pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
29th Apr 2013 10:55pm
Anonymous
- Edited 15th Apr 2019 9:40pm
29th Apr 2013 10:36pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
29th Apr 2013 10:56pm
Re: Spectral Secrets
29th Apr 2013 10:44pm
Indeed the great escape-You pen the mind and reality in it's starkness!!!
Excellent Pen as always Atakti!!!
Excellent Pen as always Atakti!!!
0
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
29th Apr 2013 10:57pm
Anonymous
- Edited 14th Nov 2018 6:35pm
29th Apr 2013 11:10pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 10:41pm
...
29th Apr 2013 11:14pm
I really like the turn this takes towards the end. It'll occur to me at some silly point in time, but I can't remember right now the writer whose poem I was reading a week ago, where in it they talked about being concerned over the password they used to log onto stuff online, and how repeating that word with their fingers loads of times a day might be influencing their mind in some way they couldn't detect. And your end verse reminded me of that - I really liked the idea in those lines, and all the clicking and tapping in them. Also think that sudden declarative 'this isn't helping' is great. Almost wanted to nudge that 'think' away so that that statement would have the whole line to itself.
1
re: ...
30th Apr 2013 8:31pm
Hmm, interesting what you say about "repeating that word with their fingers loads of times a day might be influencing their mind in some way". If you remember which writer, get back to me, I'd like to read the poem.
Thanks for your in-depth feedback. The 'think' is important to the piece, but I'm glad you liked the line.
:)
Thanks for your in-depth feedback. The 'think' is important to the piece, but I'm glad you liked the line.
:)
Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 2:27am
There is so much I want to say, but alas I'm using my freaking phone.....this is real I like real, I need real. Absolutely sufreakingburb!!!!
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re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 8:32pm
Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 5:57am
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 8:33pm
Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 6:52am
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 8:34pm
Anonymous
- Edited 15th May 2018 9:39pm
30th Apr 2013 7:50am
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 8:34pm
Anonymous
- Edited 15th May 2018 3:36pm
30th Apr 2013 10:15pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
30th Apr 2013 10:40pm
Re: Spectral Secrets
1st May 2013 3:19pm
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
1st May 2013 8:13pm
Anonymous
- Edited 14th May 2018 10:07pm
1st May 2013 8:59pm
<< post removed >>
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
1st May 2013 9:08pm
Re: Spectral Secrets
1st May 2013 9:03pm
Definitely my favorite part Atakti
"Then interrupted slumber brings me the
disorderly vomit of mind processing - a
pregnant sister drinking vinegar, a friend
bickering over clothing, distorted dogs"
Excellent read :)
"Then interrupted slumber brings me the
disorderly vomit of mind processing - a
pregnant sister drinking vinegar, a friend
bickering over clothing, distorted dogs"
Excellent read :)
0
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
1st May 2013 9:09pm
Thanks, Maggie - you and Gabriel both, and me!
Yeah, I was kinda pleased with that part. :)
Yeah, I was kinda pleased with that part. :)
Re: Spectral Secrets
Wow, I felt this way right before being involuntarily admitted to the psych ward. I was under eighteen and those who owned me felt compelled. Anywho, I'm fine now. This was very well written.
0
re: Re: Spectral Secrets
26th May 2013 9:04pm
...
Should I be worried? Maybe I would but I'm sleeping better now.
Glad to hear you're fine now, and thanks for the comment.
Welcome to DU!
Should I be worried? Maybe I would but I'm sleeping better now.
Glad to hear you're fine now, and thanks for the comment.
Welcome to DU!