Submissions by oddman

The first time I got fucked up I drank until I puked and couldn't wait to do it again
I never felt like my skin fit my whole life.
I could feel alone in a room full of people
Alcohol made all that melt away.
Subconsciously I thought to myself all those years ago
"This is what I need to level the playing field in life"
To me alcoholism is not drunkenness, its the guy
at his kids soccer game sober as a priest
feeling restless, irritable and discontent and
thinking everyone is talking about him behind his back,
feeling guilty as hell that he...

I have been on the loosing end of capitalism.
albeit my poverty was of my own making
I stuck to my money management and income generation regimen with rigorous discipline each day yet failed to achieve upward mobility.
Example...
wake up on the blue line "L"train
walk aimlessly around downtown Chicago selling "good karma"
( i.e.hustling strangers out of their disposable income).
Reach my earnings target of approximately $53 USD,spend $50 on essential operating expenses (5 bags of heroin),
$2 dollars for housing costs (the all night...

I am a throbbing ball of social discomfort wrapped in flesh
I inhale restlessness and exhale irritability and discontentedness
my heart pounds at the thought that I might blow my cover...
the optical elusion of a well adjusted tax paying sane adult
will vanish and the dork behind the curtain will appear exposing my
paper thin veneer of confidence.
alas, I practiced medicine in my room for many years until I realized there
is no cure for my condition....
Now I have no chemical pacifier to make me feel normal...
or at least make me not give a shit that...