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snugglebuck
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The Satanic Bible

poet Anonymous

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snugglebuck
Thought Provoker
United States 8awards
Joined 3rd Feb 2014
Forum Posts: 293

Hello, it’s me Lucifer.  Thank you for inviting me Dark Dreamer.  I just use Snuggle Buck as a disguise.  I’m nothing like that idiotic jerk.  I’m certain you’ll find me a quite more handsome charming flirt.  So cast off thy panties and sit at my side. And I will guide you on how to become the Devil’s bride.

I require you meet eleven qualifications, to be my ‘Queen of Eternal Damnation’.

1. Cloak yourself in the pretense of moral righteousness. Never fail to invoke God as your witness.  It fools the idiots and charms the bigots.

2. Empower yourself with vanity.  Self-love is an essential need of hypocrisy.  “Have you ever met a poorly dressed hypocrite, especially those in conservative faith and politics?”

3. Always exploit differentness.  Differentiating according to race, faith, gender and social rank, are the sharp blades needed to divide and conquer. Without hate, we cannot dominate.

4. Shame others for not taking personal responsibility.  But always blame social problems on others collectively.

5. Learn to believe in the lies you tell yourself, before you can expect for other to believe in lies about you.

6. Hate the Earth. For those who will rule ‘Hell’, it has no worth.

7. Hate women.  Especially if you are a woman. For all that is evil has, and always must, be falsely blamed on them.

8. Claim to be independent and free, never admit you need somebody.  Just use others when you have the need, then spurn them when they can't compete.

9.  Money in itself is not evil, but it is the most important tool in my toolbox.  Make a lot, and stock up.

10. Constantly moralize about sex.  It’s a great distraction from more important sins, like greed, gluttony and the rest.

11. Hate yourself.  Self-loathing is essential in mastering the art of ‘Hate’.

And though it’s not an essential requirement, consider living a life of celibacy.  For the people that have sex the least, are by far the meanest you’ll ever meet.

“Thanks for the invite.  It’s time for me to reclaim possession of Snuggle Buck before he awakens in the morning light.  Oh, how I do need to find a more deserving vessel for my wicked ghost. He's such an old decrepit homely host.”

Austin_Rura
Thought Provoker
United States 4awards
Joined 6th Dec 2013
Forum Posts: 233

Satanic Bible?.. shit i thought that was my day planner...

snugglebuck
Thought Provoker
United States 8awards
Joined 3rd Feb 2014
Forum Posts: 293

Its me Lucifer, come to call again.  Did I scare all other, of Dark Dreamer's suitors away?  

You needn't be frighten, besides, she has enough beauty for all of us to share.

So come, Satan's minions. and lets talk shop, over a delicious Danish meal.  Whilst I tutor you on some of the finer points of eternal damnation.

1. Just because the New Testament predicts our defeat on 'Judgment Day' don't accept this as a foregone conclusion.  The Finale Chapter, of our epic battle with his 'Holier Then Thou' and his legions of angels, has of yet to come to volition.

2. I'm not the Nihilist everyone assumes I am. John Milton was a poet that understood me better than any other. I possess a quite romantic soul.

3.Hell isn't nearly as bad as you'd think.  Nor is Heaven the place its cracked up to be.  If I thought the place above the stars, was the only place an omnipotent power could dwell,  I wouldn't be so happy ruling Hell.  

4. I am not the only Angel that fell from Heaven.  Read my story carefully.  I lead a revolt of angels discontent.  You may know a few.  Beelzebub, Nectaire, and that wicked little bastard, Cupid!

5.  "Your surprised Cupid's a fallen Angel?"  Well you shouldn't be.  Cupid has caused more disappointment, pain and sorrow, then all the rest of we rebels of Paradise combined.  Besides, Snuggle Buck, who's form I now possess, posted a quite enlighten piece on Cupid.  You should have read it!

6. Humanity loves us more then they love the Heavenly Host.  If they didn't, they wouldn't be asking for, and following our advice all this time.

7.  Hell is far more splendid than even Virgil in his 'Aeneid', or Dante, in his 'Inferno', described it to be.  I can't wait for you all to join me for a Midnight skinny dip in the 'Lake of Fire'.

8.  Just as St. Peter guards the Pearly Gates, I have centurion tend to the entrance to my exclusive gated community.  Hitler, is my doorman.  He screens all visitors who want to enter the 'Mouth Of Hell'.

9. Watching who comes and goes from the 'Mouth Of Hell' is quite entertaining in itself.  Many are costumed as teachers, leaders and clerics.  I've even witnessed a flying nun, come and go, like a 'bat out of Hell'.

10. You hear a lot of wailing, moaning and hollering emitting from the depths of Hell.  And why not?  This place is full of Pious Preachers and other malcontent whiners.

11.  Don't be shy, any questions you have come share, here, in the sitting room of Dark Dreamer's love pad.  Just make sure you bring some refreshments to share.



poet Anonymous

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johnrot
Dangerous Mind
United States 21awards
Joined 10th Oct 2012
Forum Posts: 2961

I got anton and crowley doin my fn laundry.......

poet Anonymous

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poet Anonymous

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Penknife
Twisted Dreamer
United Kingdom 2awards
Joined 17th Feb 2013
Forum Posts: 52

1. Have the soul of a pure parasite and bleed 'em all dry.
2. Don't help where you can do and don't explain why.
3. Lie for sake of it especially to yourself.
4. Leave your conscience and morality on the forgotten shelf.
5. Breathe and breed destruction in a never ending circle of fire.
6. Seek to sate every perverse desire.
7. Break all commandments and honor all sin.
8. In every scenario set out to win.
9. Sever all ties and divide all souls.
10.Believe it is you behind the controls!
11. Know love only as the most potent form of manipulation
and nothing more than this!
In return I promise eternal worship and everlasting bliss.



AscensionES
ae
Dangerous Mind
Australia 9awards
Joined 22nd Jan 2013
Forum Posts: 1749

The Eleven Commandments of our Lord Lucifer.

1 - Satan's the bigger man, God's talkin' a bunch of shit and Satan's like fuck this guy.
2 - I'm the good guy, don't start shit don't get hit in the clit with a pitch fork bitch.
3 - try not to be a cunt or I'm going in dry.
4 - Welcome to Hell's community gym, we lift in hell.
5 - Survival of the fuckin' fittest.
6 - No niggers, spicks or gooks.
7 - The world 'no' is blasphemous, utterance of this word warrants rape with a thousand pitchforks.
8 - BBQ's all day erryday
9 - Females are not permitted to speak out of turn.
10 - NO NIGGERS.
11 - You can rape the strippers, just don't kill 'em.

May the Arch Angel's will be done.

poet Anonymous

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AscensionES
ae
Dangerous Mind
Australia 9awards
Joined 22nd Jan 2013
Forum Posts: 1749

Thank you for 'competision' sinorita

snugglebuck
Thought Provoker
United States 8awards
Joined 3rd Feb 2014
Forum Posts: 293

And thank you Darkdeams for sponsoring such a fun completion.  I had a "Hell'uva" good time.

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